Gluten, Tax Cuts, and Hula Hoops?

What the heck is "Gluten" that so many people, including myself, would spend so much extra time and money trying to get free of it? If I can only break free, I'll be "free at last, thank God almighty, free at last." Gluten is like a tax cut, you think it looks good until you find out that not everyone will actually benefit from its ingestion. Hiding there amongst that sweet Carrot Cake with the orangy, sugary jewels of carrot on top, lies the inevitable fine print that may eventually zap you.

I used to think "Gluten Free" was the 21st Century version of the hula-hoop and perhaps it is in some circles, except in this case the "G" word is something that may not be worth the price of admission; whereas in childhood, my yellow hula-hoop was a "gotta have" worth everyone of my parent's pennies. Yellow plastic tubing became a combination family tradition, as "adults" gave it a spin, and 4th grade status symbol. Welcome to the discretionary spending world of the rising 1958 middle class. But WAIT, Gluten Free elevates me as well by announcing that my once ordinary body is no longer common, but rather selectively picky about the fast food I consume. My GF rating appears as a "healthy" brand on my hind quarters, separating me from everything at the golden arches except the Southwest salad.

So, welcome to the GF aisle at your favorite super market. May we hula-hoop our way to the back of the tax cut line, loose a few pounds in the process, and live long enough to free ourselves of the next yummy toxin.

3 comments

  • Johnny Kee

    Johnny Kee Right here!

    Some months ago I resurrected an old diet I discovered maybe 40 years ago when I was active in the martial arts. My goal was to shed weight to help save my knees. One unintended by-product of that diet was the removal of gluten, in the form of bread, cake, etc. from my intake. I had a history of digestive problems before going on the diet and started taking a daily pill to quell the heartburn. The pill worked. I decided one time to cheat on my diet and consumed some thin crust pizza. Soon my heartburn was back - the first time in ages. Now I wonder if it wasn't gluten in the pizza dough that has been my problem all along???? I had not taken concern over gluten as a serious matter (for me), but now I have to wonder if that's my problem or just a coincidence. What do you think, Ken?

    Some months ago I resurrected an old diet I discovered maybe 40 years ago when I was active in the martial arts. My goal was to shed weight to help save my knees. One unintended by-product of that diet was the removal of gluten, in the form of bread, cake, etc. from my intake. I had a history of digestive problems before going on the diet and started taking a daily pill to quell the heartburn. The pill worked. I decided one time to cheat on my diet and consumed some thin crust pizza. Soon my heartburn was back - the first time in ages. Now I wonder if it wasn't gluten in the pizza dough that has been my problem all along???? I had not taken concern over gluten as a serious matter (for me), but now I have to wonder if that's my problem or just a coincidence. What do you think, Ken?

  • Ken

    Ken Info@whoiam.band

    Gluten intolerance is hereditary. You're born with it and have it your whole life. Symptoms can be easily diagnosed as something else, when it was gluten all along. A blood test at your GP will tell the tale. I'd wonder if I were you.

    Gluten intolerance is hereditary. You're born with it and have it your whole life. Symptoms can be easily diagnosed as something else, when it was gluten all along. A blood test at your GP will tell the tale. I'd wonder if I were you.

  • Ken

    Ken info@whoiam.band

    Mis-statement on my part... Some gluten intolerances, like Celiac, are hereditary. A love of hula hoops, however, may be passed along from generation to generation for all people born after 1958. Tax cuts are universally and eternally popular regardless of the consequences.

    Mis-statement on my part... Some gluten intolerances, like Celiac, are
    hereditary. A love of hula hoops, however, may be passed along from generation to generation for all people born after 1958. Tax cuts
    are universally and eternally popular regardless of the consequences.

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